Masking is a survival strategy that many autistic girls adopt to navigate social situations. Unlike their male counterparts, autistic girls—especially those without intellectual developmental delays—often become highly skilled at observing, mimicking, and adapting to social expectations. While this can help them blend in, it comes at a significant cost to their well-being.
Masking requires a constant mental effort to decode social cues, suppress natural behaviours, and present as neurotypical. This can lead to:
🔹 Emotional Exhaustion – Social interactions become draining when every response requires careful calculation. Autistic girls may spend their days performing socially expected behaviours, leaving them depleted by the end of the day.
🔹 Disconnection from Self – Over time, masking can make it difficult for girls to recognise their own emotions, needs, and preferences. This disconnect can impact self-esteem, leading to difficulties in forming genuine friendships and understanding their own identity.
🔹 Challenges in Diagnosis – Many autistic girls mask so effectively that they go unnoticed in traditional autism assessments. Clinicians may overlook their struggles or misdiagnose them with anxiety or depression instead of recognising the underlying autism.
The constant pressure to conform can lead to:
🔹 Anxiety and Burnout – The mental load of masking can contribute to severe anxiety, fatigue, and even physical health issues. Many autistic girls experience autistic burnout—an overwhelming state of exhaustion that can take weeks or months to recover from.
🔹 Mental Health Challenges – Suppressed emotions don’t disappear; they often manifest in meltdowns, shutdowns, or long-term mental health struggles. Many autistic girls develop depression due to the pressure of fitting in while feeling misunderstood.
Encouraging authenticity is key to helping autistic girls feel comfortable in their own skin. Here’s how parents can play a crucial role in reducing the need for masking:
🔹 Validate Their Feelings – Acknowledge that social situations can be overwhelming and reassure them that they are valued for who they are, not how well they fit in.
🔹 Encourage Special Interests – Let your child explore hobbies and activities that bring them joy. These can be a great way to build confidence and meet like-minded friends.
🔹 Support Self-Advocacy – Teach your child to recognise and express their needs. Whether it’s asking for a break during social interactions or using a communication tool, self-advocacy skills will serve them well into adulthood.
🔹 Work with Their Paediatrician – Parents can provide valuable insights to paediatricians by sharing observations about their child’s social energy levels, sensory sensitivities, and emotional regulation patterns. This helps ensure assessments reflect their true needs, even if they mask in clinical settings.
🔹 Create a Safe Home Environment – At home, autistic girls should feel free to unmask without judgment. Encouraging open conversations about neurodiversity can help them embrace their identity with confidence.
No child should have to hide who they are to be accepted. By fostering an environment of understanding and advocacy, parents and paediatricians can work together to help autistic girls thrive—not by teaching them to mask, but by celebrating their true selves.